put your butt on the phone this is a booty call
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
He leaned out the window to puke right as the fan for the ac turned on. All of it blew back up into his face.
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
You shut your whore mouth, we don't talk about Drunk Nutella night.
When that wave blew your top off I heard someone yell "SPANK BANK"
As a former fat girl, that's probably the best compliment I've ever received ever!
I'm jealous that you can use my boobs as pillows & I can't.
The police report said "I asked the suspect if he had any identification. He replied yes and gave me a Pizza Hut gift card"
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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