careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
if sarah has 12 dollars and spends 6 of it on cheap booze how much will she spend on hangover food the next morning?
4 on the dollar menu at mcdonalds
mom cant say that college never taught us math
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
I had to hold off a girl who was trying to check your pulse while you were passed out. She kept screaming that she was a nursing major and needed to make sure you were alive.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
I mean, I'm all about sharing, but when he tells me about his wet dreams about Oprah, I think it's taking it too far.
you are not perverted enough for this relationship to work out.
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
And after getting thrown out of the frat house, getting carried up the hill for a half an hour, puking 5 times, and almost getting stopped by campus security, she still insisted he sleep with her. Gotta give her credit, even blacked she kept her eyes on the prize
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
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