Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
I woke up, not remembering how or when or why i was even there and looked over to find Steph spooning with an adult black man.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
Ok there's 63 pics of you jerking it on my camera from New Years. The time stamps say it took you 40 min to get there too. See a doc, your only 22.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
Randomize
