Sometimes I wonder if we could be friends if we lived closer.
We should write a comic book about the many adventures of your vagina. Maybe even give it a cape or something.
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
gay sex achievement: unlocked
what
you told me you were going out for groceries!!
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
Randomize
