i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
Also: how drunk is your brother? He just left me a message as batman.
I just high fived you brother at the bar then immediately realized my hands smell like your vagina
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
like i got into his car and the beatles were playing. this kid is def getting his dick sucked
You had me at "let me see your balls"
How was jagerbomb pong?
It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
