you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
I wanna passion pit in your ass
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
She wanted to make popcorn, but the air-popper was broken. So she dumped the entire container of kernels into the clothes dryer. Drunk movie night was a success!
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I lost my bra at his grandma's house so there's that.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Do you think you can chase a shot with chicken soup?
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
I found myself looking up beard accounts while masturbating, I guess that's what it's come to.
Randomize
