If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Why is there a frozen condom filled with water in my freezer?
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Then you jumped in the pool because your were convinced the scratches on your neck from the cat were gills and you could breathe underwater.
Kid got laid mid-party wearin a fuzzy hat with ears and 40's taped to his bear paws... wtf
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
Glitter fights sound a lot funner in theory.
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize