Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
why is it that everyone in pennsylvannia gets fucking prego??
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
I don't know. I was also picked up by the doormen and held over the bar so I could do an upside down shot out of a bartenders tits.
I still have his teeth marks on the base of my penis. You didnt miss much
the most romantic thing he could do for me right now would be to throw himself into traffic
I think I'll bring the beer we scavenged from that other party. What goes around comes around, especially when it's Corona because that shit is not staying in my fridge
Can we be in one of those super weird relationships where you carry me around everywhere?
There's still helium in the tank I found in the garbage outside the bar!
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
I just singed the hair in my nose trying to re-light a joint. now all i can smell is burnt hair. day ruiner
No seriously, I don't care if you just sucked God's dick. I have had a better Fat Tuesday than you
I threw up all of my purple drank and thats really important
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