Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
corona bottle fell out of my backpack and broke in the middle of my physics midterm. yay me.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
She may be more beautiful than I am, but I bet she hasnt pissed in as many public places as me...
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
My Dicks been hard all day. Poor guy isn't used to vacation being over
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
Randomize
