quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
PS- I just stirred my mimosa with a slice of bacon
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
My whole family just stopped to look at me and aknowledge how fucked up I am.
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Our love of vodka is more proof than a maternity test
Randomize