it was worse than that time i tried giving evan head 4 days post nose job.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
Yeah well I just ate cereal out of a muffin pan with a fork. I'll flip a coin as to who has to tackle that pile of dishes we've neglected for 3 weeks.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Yeah. That's the shitty part. God, I don't want to be a step mom. Sure I'm great with kids, but I just want unlimited sex and not have to worry about making friends with a fucking 7 year old.
The only downside to doctor sex is that getting choked with a stethoscope leaves marks.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
You ever have a fart follow you around?
Randomize
