I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
We can just keep having sex until one of us finds someone we actually like
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
I'm so happy for you. But I still have to shave because a woman has needs and this woman needs an orgasm.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Did I ever tell you what happened that night after he ran you over?
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
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