I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
Had a 3 sum last night, and today food just taste better and the air seems so much fresher!
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
Can you explain to me why there are fake boobs glued on my chest?
At no time is it ever okay for my doctor to compliment my tattoos, when giving me a physical exam.......
I saw a shooting star while he was eating me out at 3am by my neighbors pool. Doesn't get more magical than that
She wants to have a threesome with Taylor Swift. I think this is the kind of love my grandparents spoke of.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Well that didn’t go as expected.
I mean, it ended in you giving each of them a blowjob, so it kinda did.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize