Suite mates just came in and said that we have to go to Africa. They're already packed. Didn't know you could get that high.
I just gave some chick my debit card to put in the jukebox. She better put out.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
i lost his rear view mirror, your phone charger, and my lesbian virginity. 21 isn't shaping up too well so far.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
that freshman chick we always see on the weekends walked into art class wearing a jaegermeister shirt and holding a monster, which she proceeded to shotgun with a pair of scissors. It sickens me to know I will never achieve her level
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
to instagram or to not instagram the picture i took of when i shit in the urinal
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
The wine is franzia the food is cheese puffs there is a canoe full of beer and the andre glasses are mason jars glued to candle sticks. i shit you not. Best. Wedding. Ever.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
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