didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
google image searching george stephanopoulos at 1 AM on a saturday night...once again
She was so high she ate a little piece of weed off her pants and thought it was food.
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
Just pee around me
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
He lit a shoe on fire and tried putting it out by peeing on it
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
she's pretty fucking smug for someone who has had unprotected sex with a convicted felon
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Randomize
