Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
I accidentally burped into my bong.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
You kept buying everyone Washington apple shots, and telling us we needed to support local produce.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
Sadness tears and throw up everywhere
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
The usual, im laying out. Ipod on shuffle, Large spray bottle to cool myself of and a smaller one filled with chilled vodka. I can spray the vodka right in my mouth without even opening my eyes. THIS IS LIVING....
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
He plays guitar, sings like an angel, and acts like a gentleman. If I don't fuck him by the end of first semester, I'm dropping out
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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