she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
You passed out in the bathroom with the door locked. Had to take a shit in your litter box. Don't worry, your cat buried it for me.
i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
We're trying to decide between cracker barrel an the ER
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
As its breast cancer awareness month, I'm going to do my part by making everyone aware of my breasts
Plus, I have my cousin, the dominatrix, to help me out if things get out of hand
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Randomize
