I will show your tits more attention than Michael Jackson's death.
i am high, trapped with a bunch of skaters and asians watching a cat on lsd on youtube, the girl on the couch next to me is getting fingered, and there is lady gaga playing. god has forgetten about me
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Ive seen teh same guy pissing in the corner. Twice. Its eally weird. My frieds gonna do th funnel. Im so excited for her! Love, cori. Cuz its lik a diary.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
He came on my face and he was genuinely concerned about getting it in my hair. I'm marrying him.
Sorry, my phone died and I decide to charge my vibrator instead. #priorities
Randomize