I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
How are you feeling today?
i could've thrown up on command at any point today...
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
I am a terrible person. This is almost as bad as when I was going to see my ex while my boyfriend was at that funeral.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
Dude it started out with let's find some food and ended up with me getting a needle in the face
The perfect world is just rainbows and rocknroll and good sex. With the occasional stripper ridIng a horse. I spelled occasionally right?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
My roommate just walked in with a case of beer locked himself in his room and told us he was going to masturbate his feelings away...
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
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