super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Mental picture: Us at a bar keeping it classy shot gunning PBR's in the corner.
That was a good example of when keeping it real goes right
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
the awesomeness of being snowed in wore off after we ran out of beer and we realized we really didnt want to be stuck with everyone.
Waking up in a pool chair wrapped in toilet paper is not what I planned when I agreed to movie night
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
Watch the news tonight. They interviewed me about a fire. I was high as balls so it should be entertaining.
sorry bout that man. went out to pay the pizza boy, ended up hooking up with some random drunk girl that thought i was someone else
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
I'm a bit offended I got no nudies back but it's whatever
They're in the mail. Snapchats too fast. I want the suspense.
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Okay I'm ready to show you that my weiner still works
Too late, I'm convinced it's broken
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
