I can only date guys with blackberrys
I just decided its a new prereq to talk to me
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
Well, find something you can use as a snorkel and be aware of your surroundings.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
See this is why people shouldn't jump into marriage. See what type of drunk you're engaged to first.
So the bump is from hitting my head in an elevator. Apparently I dived into a cab head first too.....
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
He kept telling me my vagina was a pleasure cave... I ended up just taking it as a complimetn
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Randomize
