i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
well she hit her head and had a concussion. i had to make out with her to keep her awake.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Almost bit the guy's hand who sits in front of me because he was stretching. That. Bored.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
My boyfriend just called me on his poop break from work.... Is that what you meant by moving too fast?
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
Yes, the maid of honor did just deep throat the mic during the toast. How do I follow that?
Randomize