her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
You asked the dj to play 'who let the dogs out" because it was your birthday. You left the bar and then re-entered to the song
Wow i just got reported to security for being a homeless person trying to break into the library.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
My Pizza Lunchables won't fit in the fridge because of all your alcohol. One of our addictions has to give.
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
time for you to cut the loving, understanding, non-judgmental crap and say/do whatever it takes to make sure I never, ever, ever sleep with him again ever
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
He fucking took my shirt off and didn't even touch my boobs. What the actual fuck.
....even the bartender was embarrassed for her
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
