You really coming over, don't trick.
I know i should have focused more on what you were saying in the text rather than the fact you spelt "suicidal" wrong
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
He would drink pee if it was in a beer can
She's on her way over to shave my year round sweater vest into a festive argyle sweater vest. Keeper?
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
He responded to all of my texts prodding for dirty talk with "I will do anything you are comfortable with."\n\nChivalry is great, but being comfortable doesn't get me wet.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
Randomize
