i bet jesus would rush if he went to usc
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
I'm not taking advise from someone who responded to the pickup line "I have a penis"
If I had that in my pants Omg I would want a shirt made so everyone knew
Thank you for not boning my boss.
My new dealer was watching Space Jam and eating ham off a frisbee when I went over. He's my new favorite person
He's a fucking asshole. Who gives good head. And seriously I have never seen someone less committed to hair color
Seeking encouragement from my tinder matches to ace this test. I've sunk to a newest low.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
Randomize
