I woke up this morning in your mom's car... any ideas?
its official now. im not pissing on secret service cars with a senators inside anymore.
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
By the way, i got bored and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
Time to do stuff I know I'll have to hide from my grandkids one day and everyone at next weekends wedding.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
I dont care how high you are "yes" is not the correct response to "what do you want from Taco Bell" Mom.
I think I should advise against you hooking up with a guy that throws "the shocker" up in all of his pictures on facebook. Just sayin.
I was gonna tell her, but there were too many tongues in my mouth
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
jump out the window naked night went bad
Randomize