White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
well on the bright side, he charges $60 for an eighth
so he'll probably take me somewhere nice
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
I just saw a girl make a shank with the underwire in her bra...
i'm so high that my cigarette just tasted like chef boyardee. no lie.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Just told my mom sparks is a health drink. Officially getting hammered on the way to the beach.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
I just power puked in the office bathroom.. blew blood vessels in my eyes and now I'm ready for a donut.... success
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
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