well recently, every guy I have hooked up with has been economy sized
Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
he just asked me if he could show me what he wanted to do to me using his action figures. where do i find these freaks?
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
Would you like me to write a persuasive essay on how you should let me suck your dick?
The last party at your house was a sex toy party...it's an obvious transition to baby shower
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You used a fucking bud light like as lube last night. I'd get a UTI test like stat.
Listen, I've got balls in my face can I call you back
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
dude you know how i got totally hammered and lost my phone at some frat when i came to visit you two months ago? yeah well someone mailed it back to me in minnesota.. with a picture of a cock as the screen savor
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
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