i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
did you seriously just ask me if there is such thing as a sophisticated batman shirt?
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Life after highschool has not been kind to her. She looked fatter than Luke Wilson's face in those AT&T commercials.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Am I allowed to be in denial about being gay again? Or is that one of those things you can't do?
At one point, he came in to give her a pep talk, and then after he left, she just kept whispering his name into the toilet between heaves.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
please don't ironically join a cult
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