Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
I'm at subway, this 8 year old kid is judging my fashion sense with his dad. I want to kill myself.
It's ok, he's just 8, he's not judging you.
He just asked why I'm sitting alone. I honestly want to cry.
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
can I come stay the night
yeah, but no sex tonight
I'll stay home
I can't even use my hands i'm so hungover
Sober me is really good at getting to the airport on time. Drunk me is really good at shitting my pants. Do you know how much pants cost at the airport????
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
Me and two guys that I made Eskimo bros all soberly slept together in my bed
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
He kept referring to my giving him head as a new level in our relationship and acting sentimental
You gave him a bj, not a kidney
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