Draw a picture of yourself puking and peeing on her and give it to her with a note that sys this could be your future if you be my friend
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
I just realized my new apartment is at the corner of Patrick Henry and Mary Jane.
Give me weed or give me death?
It's ok, I did squats with my bottle of wine before I opened it. That counts as the gym since I won't be getting there haha
Ever since I got to LA my dream self has been having sex with way too many rabbi's.
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
The only thing i ask you for is vegan food and sex.
You ran up to my room. I was naked. You refused to leave without drugs. I love you.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize
