He said he's gonna start calling me "Benny" because we're "friends with bennyfits"
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
He came to the party late, didn't bring tacos, and then asked what shennanigans we were getting into. I swear I will never fuck another hipster.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
It's hard to be judgmental of others when you are wearing silver pleather.
There is a chick at the bar in a bumble bee onesie, complete with wings. Yeah, I must be back in Seattle.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Get here now. I need a drinking buddy. I don't care if you're in a different timezone, it'll be five o clock here faster.
Is it sad that my idea of a quality foursome would involve one person eating me out while the other two rub my feet?
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