so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I wish I could drop acid with the muppets
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
my tonsil wound opened up during the kegstand but i stopped it with a popsicle
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
New rule. Every time you and I have a disagreement that lasts longer than 10min, while in a bar, we'll have a shot. Figure we'll eventually start agreeing sooner rather than later...
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
I'm finally in my bed, my pants are off, and there's no pee on my carpet this is the best life has been all day
My doctor said I can only have one drink at a time, ever, from now on. My life has officially started its decline.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
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