New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I'm in a subway station watching a tranny do her makeup. This is like watching a unicorn giving birth.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I just bought a vibrating toothbrush with my parents FSA insurance card because I'm too broke for a vibrator. New.Level.Of.Low.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
Can we discuss your tits for a sec? That melon patch sprung up over night
Update: day 5 and Scott has not left the apartment. Still smoking. Pizza roll supply dwindling.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
I got so drunk last night I took a ice bath with my mother in law
On a scale of 1-10 I’m at biblical violence
Always great to be boarding a plane when you realize that what you thought was gas is actually very untrustworthy
Randomize