I drank enough to make her look pretty . . It worked and i threw up while going at it
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
iphones do not disturb setting is the biggest cock block to my 3am booty calls
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Nothing says "class act" like eating acid in the middle of a Buffalo Wild Wings
he called me his ex's name during sex then proceeded to cry while still in me
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
Randomize
