I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
And people are going to start dressing like that in public, it's just ridiculous, the goths and now the GAGAs
About to find out how well alcohol and lazer tag mix.
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I think im drinking tonight later on...which is good cuz i walked pass the liquor aisle the other day and i swear i heard a kid call me a pussy
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
Daquari drive throughs 24 hours a day. LORD HAVE MERCY
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
His ex-girlfriend just gave his current girlfriend the heimlach omg omg omg help this is so awkward
he only noticed i dyed my hair purple like halfway through sex and he looked really shocked and he just said "You look like Barney." as he came.
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
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