She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Im sleeping in your bed. Sorry for the sand and the noise and the loud people. Im starving
Your blankets are not drunk friendly
I would feel bad that's he's locked out naked, but the world should really see that.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
Trying to coordinate a drug deal while taking a psych test is not easy.
for me, it's working out the tricky timing of the Viagra and nightly laxative.
Hahaha idk what's worse your life or my hangover.
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I wanted to make my beer stronger so I poured vodka in it. Why god....why
Randomize
