Just woke up. I have a "Detective Jacob Arnold's" business card in my pocket.
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
I thought I broke my iPhone. I was almost as depressed as the day I broke my vibrator.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
I told the girl who was peeing in the garbage can she must have had a lot of upper body strength.
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Went to the doctor's today. The lady took one look at my throat and said "oh god"
Too much penis in there.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
I can't turn off my feet"
Good news!! I can adult!! 😂 turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ðŸ˜ðŸ˜‚
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
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