so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
just got cropdusted by the delivery guy...this was not in my job description.
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
you're thinking of things to pack this weekend and you think Don King wig?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
My roomate asked me why she found condoms in the pringles container. I don't know what to tell her
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
sounds like it. if it makes you feel better i blew up a $75000 farm tractor last night.
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
Randomize
