..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Wedsnesdays are always enlightening. Tonights revealation: One should not smoke from something taller than their person.
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
i told the bartender last night that if the palace saloon made a calendar he would be every month.
I have fb friend requests from two random swedish brothers... Must have something to do with that hostel I stumbled into on mardi gras
So high. I just took a picture of my chewed gum so I can remember to paint a picture of it as a cloud later.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
the only evidence i have from this weekend existing is a title page for a novel i tried writing called "the oyster who gave up drinking"
I totally just potholed and almost crashed while trying to lick salsa off my boob.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
It's 2016 and I'm somehow banging the milkman.
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
