so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
this study room smells like vodka
the study room thinks the same about you
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
One of those nights had to have been when we tried to walk through the McDonald's drive through -- and then got in the car with complete strangers. And stole their hamburgers.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
After you smoke one night. Just whisper in a barely audible voice, "Grey Poupon"
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
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