K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I found her sleepin on the side of the house in the rocks. so i woke her up and yelled at her and she would only come inside if i let her sleep in the bathroom.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
We somehow managed to get the sumo-wrestler costume into the washing machine, but I don't think the cupcake icing completely came off... And it still smells like tequila.
I was drunk petting a fox and taking shots of Jager. That's about as outdoorsy as it gets.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
I'm going to miss recovering from hangovers on the beach. Rolling around in my dorm bed and watching Friends reruns is just gonna feel like slumming it.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
We were making eye contact while i was throwing up.
Randomize
