i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
Golf group in front of us has 2 hooker caddies. One guy was getting a lap dance as he waited to tee off. Only in vegas.
Omg. The nephews found my stripper pole. The scary part is theyre good at it.
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
He snapchatted me the wine on the ceiling this morning
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
I have no clue how you survived last night but I applaud you. 21 body shots off 9 bodies in under four hours has to be a record.
I realized my soar muscles form the shape of me leaning over a toilet
you going clubbing tonight?
well its tuesday isnt it
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