why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
My dick was out way too much saturday not to get laid
As added birth control I warned him that if he knocked me up tonight I would name the baby Truck.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
No one ever gets any after sleeping with her. She is like the broken mirror of hookups, enjoy 7 years of blue ball. Don't say I didn't warn you
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
Yiu ever laugh so hard you stop breathing? Turns out weed -can- kill you.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
I'M TOO HORNY FOR GRAMMAR!!!
Fun fact: I came home from the riverboat without my panties. And woke up with a different pair on.
It wasn't until after we began having sex again the next morning I realized I didn't know his name.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
Randomize
