So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
if I see one grey pube I'm spitting his penis out!
I found his backpack for the weekend. All it had was ping pong balls, mardi gras beads, and Tums.
i swear to god. if they dont have practically DTF written on their foreheads, or a glowstick in their hands, strictly no entry.
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
Sup man, did you have a 3way this month if so it would be 3 for 3 for the house
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
That's why we have robots to masturbate for us
Do you knowhow much it sucks to puke in an automatic toilet? Not fun.
Ew.
It takes talent let's just say that
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
