I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
She goes outside, smokes 2 cigarettes, and insists on walking up the 7 flights of stairs so that her heart stays in shape. this woman is crazy.
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
If it makes you feel any better, I'm eating a block of cheese...
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
You might see me up a tree with a deranged look in my eye , just walk away at that point
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
