Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
So I accidentally txted this girl with the same name as the one im seeing, as it turns out shes still dtf
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
I don't have any money, so I'm just gonna press my boobs against him for his birthday.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
The thought "Ummm which pants am I wearing? ...I *am* wearing pants, right?" just ran through my head. I'm done. So done.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
You walked up to a random girl on the street and asked her for a bite of her pizza...
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
*tries to be fun and flirty* *literally gets peed on*
I’ve gone two rounds already this morning and I’m ready for a third. The moon is in the house of sluticus hornius.
Randomize
