Pappa wants mamma naked
i celebrated the independence of our country by dry heaving tequila all morning. so classy. happy 4th.
if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
Chasing 100 proof soco w water from the tap at 4 pm, it's gonna one of those kinda Thursdays...
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
she's lying on the floor with a bottle of vodka, belting shakira. plz advise.
I've started making all these amazing things...like bananas rolled in doritos..bandritos.
Then she cat effected the picture of my dick I sent her the other night. I'm in love.
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
Just peed out a window, not entirely sure it's open. Can't tell. I'll find out in the morning.
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
How did they ever let a trainwreck like myself run a bar?!
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