just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
My boobs grew. They knew we were going to vegas.
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I've got to admit, I'm a little hesitant about giving him road head. I've seen how he drives and I've seen how he acts when I give him head. A small part of me is saying this is going to end badly.
Witnessing a crazy lady on the bus screaming about how romney is one of the four horsemen of the apocalypse.
So, I'm a little drunk in Seattle with Glenna, but we've all agreed that it's patriotic to think about Bill Clinton from time to time during sex. 'Merica
It's still 8am.
Yeah, but its wine drunk. WITH A DOCTOR. THAT MAKES MY MORNING CLASSY.
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
My vagina feels like a chupacabra ripped me apart using its mythological set of needle pointed teeth
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
The best walk of shames are on the highway
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