glad my latex allergy prevents me from being a one-night stand whore
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
i just walked into thanksgiving and three people in a row asked me who i was. really?
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Maybe. I want to have sex at the fire station, most likely on one of the trucks. I wonder if I can finagle that before I tire of the spelling and grammatical errors in his texts.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Are there edibles for sale in the Denver airport because if so bring those to my mouth
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I can't believe you cupped pat's balls to prove your fake relationship
Wait, there's no way I said I would suck his dick. I know drunk Katie.
No, you told him to suck YOUR dick.
See now that sounds like drunk Katie.
Justin has passed out on the toilet in a locked stall. Stay tuned for pics.
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